I’ve been on a soul break for the past few months.
It’s been a journey within a journey. And I’d like to share some learnings.
Exactly one year ago today I was on my epic Himalayan adventure to Upper Mustang, Mount Everest and beautiful Bhutan. If you missed my musings, click
HERE to find the first of 4 posts. I returned on October 31 of last year, energized with inspiration, ready to jump into the many new projects and new ideas that filled my head and my heart.
Then a shocking and unexpected event caused my priorities to shift completely, away from HUM, away from my own creative projects and goals.
The day after I returned, I accompanied my mother to the doctor and we discovered that something wasn’t quite right. After a month of testing and a traumatic stay in the hospital (beware of allergies to CT scan dye!), she was diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer. She never smoked a day in her life. She had golfed all summer and been her usual active self. But three months after I returned home from my trip, she was gone.
This last part of my mother’s journey gave me another reminder (I’ve had a few in my life) of the fact that you never know what tomorrow will bring and so you must make the most of every single day you have. Because each day is all there is. Life is fragile. Uncertain. You can plan your life as much as you want, but you will never know how things will unfold.
A lot of serenity comes with knowing how to flow with whatever life brings you, expected or unexpected, how to stay grounded and balanced. It may take a whole lifetime to figure out how to do this, but all of our mindfulness practices, yoga and meditation, can really help. The dark times offer us the opportunity to develop our strategies for facing our challenges and for finding that flow.After my mother was gone, my priority shifted towards taking care of myself. I allowed myself to let go of my business goals for a little while and to focus more on soul-care, on self-kindness and self-compassion. This included hands-on projects like home renovation, organizing cupboards, gardening and cooking. My creative inspiration was really low. I needed to physically feel my way through tasks and projects rather than let my mind roam.
Losing a loved one is very hard, you may know that already. The sad thing is that the more we live, the more we lose, it’s just the nature of life.
Here are a few things I’ve been realizing and that have helped me through my last few months. I invite you to consider them for your own journey, as I think they can apply to all our dark times…
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Soul-care can help you to survive difficult times. Self-kindness allows you to thrive. It’s restorative, it’s healing, it’s absolutely necessary. So give yourself permission to take care of yourself every single day, in whatever way works best for you. And offer yourself unconditional soul love. Remember, you can’t take care of others if you don’t first take care of yourself. Find 30 Easy Ways to Practice Self Kindness.
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Letting go is a pathway to serenity. Letting go of unhelpful ideas, thoughts and emotions that can arise at any time, especially the dark times, can leave space for serenity and the possibility of moving forward with grace. Letting go doesn’t mean you don’t care, or that you are indifferent. It doesn’t mean giving up. Letting go is not easy, but it’s an effort that is definitely worth it. Because letting go is freedom. Try one of these 4 Letting Go Practices to Make Space for New Energy.
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Hope is a powerful thing. It’s the power of positive thinking, of seeing the possibilities, of always seeing the light. If there’s one thing I know, it’s that there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. No matter how long and dark the tunnel is, there’s always a light. The tunnel always comes to an end. And everything will always be ok. This belief is hope to me. One of the ways we kept our hope up for the three months of my mother’s illness was to find something joyful in each day. Even if that joy is found simply in the powerful words “I love you”.
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In challenging times, it is helpful to shift your perspective, to see things differently, in order to see more clearly. And to move forward. Mindfulness practices help you to develop awareness of your thoughts, feelings and emotions, and to cultivate the ability to see things differently - to see things as they are. If you feel stuck, sometimes you have to take a breath and a step back and to look at things sideways to see a way through, or to get back to balance. Here are 10 Mini Mindfulness Practices for Everyday Life.
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Gratitude allows you to appreciate what you have, instead of focusing on what you don’t have. I’m immensely grateful for the mother I had and the unconditional love she showed all our family; for the fact that she lived her life to the fullest, on her own terms, faced every challenge with strength and grace. I’m grateful for the opportunity to help her through her last journey, and for the gift of holding her hand and talking her into the next evolution of her being. Please know that it took a true shift in perspective, from grief to gratitude, for me to see the last moments of her life as a gift, for me and for her. A daily gratitude practice is always helpful.
Well, I’m back now. The inspiration I need to fulfill my HUM mission is returning. And I will be writing more about these points as well as other ideas, tips, thoughts and practices to empower your yoga, meditation and mindfulness practices, to support and inspire you on the beautiful transformative journey that is your life.
Thank you for reading, for being here with me. I appreciate it immensely!
